A Barrel Full of Monkeys
by rashes
Summary: okay, people! what do you get when you mix three idiots with access to weapons, no morals, and a manslayer? a rated 'r' story and a barrel full of monkies! spelled how i want to spell it


Disclaimer: in this comic, the characters that are not mine are all the cast of Fruits Basket and the cast of Samurai X and Rurouni Kenshin. Under no circumstances will I be held responsible for lost or missing property (such as your spleen) and I will not replace lost or stolen credit cards. Also, the characters such as the lighting crew and the camera crew are the property of Mer007, a writer on , and of whom is a close friend of mine. I am using her characters at her digression. Also, Dr. Hobo is property of VG Cats, a trademarked (I think) webcomic of which I enjoy. If you have a heart attack at the stupidity and utter randomness of this spoof on life, just stop reading 'cuz it's always going to get worse. Thank you.  
  
Note: I spell all things how I mean to spell them so don't get in a snit about spelling with me, because you'll just lose. -Rashes Rating: restricted, for sexual references, violence, and language.  
  
A Barrel full of Monkies  
  
Scene start: the insanity begins Jon: shaking head well, here are. L.A. What do we do now?  
  
Lily: maybe we could find a place to spend the night?  
  
Jon: yeah!  
  
Nina: hey, look! An old abandoned theater! Let's stay there since we're broke.  
  
Jon: nah, it could be haunted.  
  
Lily: oh, come on, Jon. I'll protect you.  
  
Jon: smirks okay.  
  
Nina: save it people. We need to get in before we freeze.  
  
Jon: under breath damn(just when I think I can get a little "alone" time with lily(that  
  
Nina had to butt in(  
  
Lily: hmm?  
  
Jon: oh, nothing. smirks  
  
Some damn bum: slurred hey, peoples. Can I come with you for a while? I'm looking for and 'venture.  
  
Nina: before anyone else could react sure! By the way, what's your name?  
  
Dr. Hobo: ny mame is Dr. Hobo.  
  
Everyone: aaahhhh(...  
  
Everyone: (  
  
Jon: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight( thinks to himself wow, this guy could be fun(  
  
Lily: why are you a doctor?  
  
Dr. Hobo: you see this? holds up scalpel why would anyone else other than a doctor have this?  
  
Everyone:aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((  
  
Jon: damn it, I'm cold! Let's just get in the condemned building before I freeze to death!  
  
Lily: Jon! Don't swear! slices Jon's kidney with her hand  
  
Jon: oh, shit! That hurt!  
  
Lily: and there's more where THAT came from.  
  
Jon: world of pain!  
  
All except Jon: stares at Jon writhing on the ground holding his left kidney(  
  
Lily: well, like Jon said, lets go.  
  
All: walks to the side entrance  
  
door shakes  
  
All: oh crap...  
  
door bursts open, revealing Inu Yasha, a demon slayer and a horde of fangirls close at his heels shouting "sit boy"  
  
Jon: wtf?! guards both kidneys  
  
All: enter stage left All: sees a fully decked stage complete with light crews, camera men, and on the stage sat a  
  
woman, sitting on a couch with what seemed to be anime characters from the anime "Fruits Basket" (from which the author of this looks upon with great favor) and is saying something about a giant sword one of the characters is holding.  
  
Kenshin: oro? (Translation: what?)  
  
Jon: HEY! Aren't you that one guy...oh, what's your name...oh yeah! The Botosi? Was it?  
  
Kenshin: I prefer not to talk about that.  
  
Jon: aah. Well, was I right or not?  
  
Kenshin: yep. I am, or was, the Botosi.  
  
Jon: let's get out before he kills us all!  
  
Kenshin: dun worry, im all better now. I haven't killed in a long, long time.  
  
Nina: is busy trying to keep up with all that has happened and still recovering from her heart stopping three lines up  
  
Jon: hey, who is that over there threatening to kill us all with that big- ass sword?  
  
Kenshin: I have no clue.  
  
Jon: well, then, you know what they say: when the tough get going the tough get machine guns.  
  
Kenshin: no!  
  
Jon: stfu!  
  
Kenshin: hey!  
  
Jon: clutches kidney too late  
  
Lily: I told you to stop!  
  
Kenshin: wow. Can you teach me how to do that?  
  
Lily: sure. All you do is punch the person slightly behind the side in the kidney. And if you kick a person in a certain spot in the back of the leg, they fall down and piss themselves (I'm really not kidding on this).  
  
Kenshin: hey look! Get that dog!  
  
Dog: bark  
  
Lily: what's that in its mouth?  
  
Kenshin: you don't want to know.  
  
Lily: blushes oh...right...GET OVER HERE, DOGGIE!  
  
Kenshin: smacks face I've created a monster...  
  
Jon: seriously, what is that in the dog's mouth?  
  
Kenshin: my loincloth.  
  
Nina: thinks nice.  
  
Lily: running after dog a little help...over here...please?  
  
Kenshin: actually, I'm pretty tired.  
  
Jon: yeah. Let's get to a hotel or something.  
  
Kenshin: I'm with you, man.  
  
Jon: lily! C'mon! Were going now!  
  
Lily: 'kay!  
  
Nina: well, what're we waiting for?! Let's go! Scene end 


End file.
